You’re Getting a New Pastor

May 22, 2013 2 Comments

Tis the season. For what, you ask?

Many churches begin to prepare for the transition of their pastor. July 1 is the typical day when a new pastor starts in a new church.

Many leaders in the church tend to get anxious during this time. Many questions run through their mind as they try to “guess” what the next pastor will be like.

  • Will he be supportive of my ministry?
  • Is he a micromanager?
  • What’s his vision for the church?
  • Is he going to fire us and bring in all new people?
  • Is he a good pastor?

It’s normal to ask those questions, and they are good questions to ask. I have colleagues on the Diocesan level that have the same apprehensions when they are expecting a new bishop. The challenge for them is that they are often told to not start anything new until the new bishop comes.

Basically, they are being asked to maintain the status quo until new leadership arrives.

Relax. There is no need to fear. Most pastors don’t come in assuming that your church is in need a major overhaul. Often times, they spend the first year just getting to know the new church community before instituting anything major.

If you are expecting a new pastor or bishop, I’d recommend doing these things while you wait.

  • Keep planning ahead for your ministry. Don’t wait for the new leader to come in and tell what to do. They often won’t tell you what to do. Plus, you are the keeper of the vision for your ministry. You are the expert. Keep moving forward.
  • Tie up all loose ends before the old pastor leaves. There is a sense of urgency during this time that you can take advantage of. The outgoing pastor wants to tie up loose ends too, and often decisions can be made much more quickly than before. This is a great time to make some significant changes that you’ve been wanting to make, but couldn’t until now.
  • Don’t assume a worst-case scenario about the new pastor. This doesn’t help your attitude or the people around you. Assume the best and have a good attitude.
  • Don’t talk badly about the outgoing or the incoming pastor. That’s just not cool and sets you up for disaster.
  • Prepare now for your first meeting with the new pastor. Set up an agenda outlining what you want to share with him about your ministry and how. This is your opportunity to set a good first impression about you as a ministry leader and your ministry.

Remember that pastors are human, too. They have apprehensions and fears about coming into a new church community and are probably asking some of the same questions that you are asking. Be prepared and have a good attitude about the transition in leadership.

Question: Are you expecting a new pastor? What are you doing in preparation?

Filed Under: Attitude, Leadership, Relationships

2 Questions for the Multi-Cultural Church to Ask

May 6, 2013 Leave a Comment

How diverse is your church?

If you’re like the typical church in the United States of America, you are probably dealing with some mix of Anglos, Latino’s, Asian/Pacific Islander, or Black. With a population that diverse, a church has to think about the specific needs of the community it serves.

In a recent episode of The Best Youth Ministry Podcast Ever…Maybe, the podcast team talked about what a multi-cultural youth ministry looks like.

The reality can be that the cultural communities often have their own specific ministry for their cultural community. It is not uncommon, for instance, to have two religious education programs for children; one for the Latino community and one for the Anglo community. The same can be true for youth ministry, where a church could have 3 different youth ministries; one for the Latino, Anglo, and Vietnamese community. This is often the case in the area I serve, the Diocese of San Jose.

As a ministry leader, I have to take into account the cultural diversity of my church. There are 2 questions that are worth considering when analyzing my church ministry in light of the diversity within the church:

1. Is it okay to have separate programs for different cultural communities?

Ken Johnson-Mondragon, from the Instituto de Fe y Vida, wrote an excellent blog post on the subject. The answer is yes. It is important that the church recognizes the cultural differences of a community and respond accordingly. This has less to do with language and more to do with cultural. As a ministry leader, I cannot treat everyone like they are in the same place and have the same needs.

The pastoral needs of each cultural community is very different.

Ministry leaders need to respond to those specific pastoral needs. However, the ministries to different communities need to be in line with the mission of the church. Yes, you have separate programs, but they also needs to be working in concert with each other moving the church forward.

There are times where it is necessary to bring all the communities together. This is to build unity among community and remind everyone that we are one church, not multiple churches.

2. Which groups am I not serving?

The answer may not be as simple as you might think. A recent revelation for me is that a church often does a good job ministering to recent immigrants as well as those whose families have been well established in the United States for years.

The group that is often overlooked is the 2nd generation.

They are often bi-lingual and bi-cultural. They don’t quite fit in with the ministry for recent immigrants and they don’t quite fit in to the ministry for those families that have been well established in the area for years.

The consequence is that they feel like they don’t quite belong in the church. What are their specific pastoral needs and how can you respond to them?

Question: How does your ministry respond to the multi-cultural reality of your church?

Filed Under: Leadership, Relationships

The Biggest Mistake a Leader Can Make

May 2, 2013 Leave a Comment

Have you made a mistake lately?

If your answer to this question is anything but “yes,” then you’re either lying or not leading.

Part of being a leader means dealing with your own mistakes and failures. It happens. There are some mistakes that are bigger than others.

In this video, different leaders share what they think some of the biggest mistakes are that a leader can make. As I watched, I found myself nodding my head often, as I reminisced about the times I have made those very mistakes.

Question: Which mistake shared in the video do you agree with the most? What mistake would you add?

Filed Under: Attitude, Equipping, Leadership, Relationships Tagged With:

Helping Parents Pass on a Legacy of Faith to Their Children

May 1, 2013 2 Comments

I was recently asked to give a talk to parents about how they can pass on faith to their kids. As I prepared for this talk, this one line kept coming to mind:

Home is church, too. We experience God in the context of our intimate relationships.

I first heard that quote at a Vibrant Faith @ Home seminar from Leif Kehrwald. It really struck a chord with me.

As a ministry leader, I have often focused on how I can get more people to my programs and events at the church. My goal is always to connect them to the church community and to Christ, but I sometimes fell into the trap that the best place for this to happen was at church.

Yet, research continues to show that parents have the biggest influence on the faith life of everyone in the home, including the children. Therefore, my role also needs to be about empowering parents to take that influence seriously.

The best way I can do this is by helping parents come to the realization that the home is church, too.

In Kehrwald’s seminar, he shared with us the 6 ways that families grow in faith together.

Families grow in faith together when…

  1. They talk with each other about their faith (not preach or teach faith)
  2. They pray together in ways that are comfortable and comforting
  3. They ritualize their important moments
  4. They reach out in service and support of others
  5. They share Bible stories to connect with family stories
  6. They learn about faith together in comfortable and fun ways

For the talk I was asked to do with parents, I merely took Kehrwald’s ideas and made them more concrete and tried to provide practical ways where parents could do all 6 of these things in some way, shape, or form.

Here are some examples I share for each of the 6 ways to grow in faith together:

  1. Share with your kids some things about the faith that you totally agree with and some things that you are currently struggling with. Make the topic age appropriate.
  2. When something major happens in the life of your family, take time to pray. That could be when a family member is sick, a dog dies, a sacrament is celebrated, or a child passed a major test or milestone.
  3. Create a ritual at home around birthdays, graduations, getting a driver’s license, and for the first and last day of school.
  4. When the kids are young, help out an ailing senior citizen clean up their house or cook a meal for them. When they are teens, go as a family on a parish mission trip either out of city, state, or country. Or, when you are on vacation as a family, take a few hours to do some service where ever you are.
  5. Read the story of Jesus’ birth and talk about the day that your children were born.
  6. Take one of the interactive sessions from Vibrant Faith @ Home and use it as a family. It’s free and there are a ton of resources to use.

The key is to keep it simple. Families are busy. The goal is to not add one more thing to their plate. The goal is to make faith a normal routine at home.

And it doesn’t have to be complicated.

Question: What strategies have you used to empower parents to take their role seriously as the primary teacher of the faith?

Filed Under: Equipping, Relationships Tagged With:

Are You Busy or Disciplined?

April 30, 2013 Leave a Comment

“Most of us lead busy but undisciplined lives. We have ever-expanding ‘to do’ lists, trying to build momentum by doing, doing, doing – and doing more. And it rarely works. Those who build the good-to-great companies, however, made as much use of ‘stop doing’ lists as ‘to do’ lists. They displayed a remarkable discipline to unplug all sorts of extraneous junk.” –Jim Collins

I take personal offense to this quote. Why? Because it describes me perfectly!

I like to be on the move. I’m a doer. I take action. In fact, my wife accused me of stressing her out when at home one weekend. While we should have been relaxing and enjoying our time together, I wanted to try and take care of this, that and, oh yeah, that too!

She busted me in only a way a spouse could. And she was right.

I bring that same attitude to my ministry. I sometimes think to myself, “As long as I’m doing something, anything, then my ministry will be a success.”

Well, after years of being busy, do I have the success I was looking for?

Yes and no.

Yes in the sense that I have moved the ministry forward in innovative and exciting ways. No in the sense that I know I could have been much further along if I was more disciplined.

Daily, I keep doing things that aren’t helpful in moving my ministry forward. Yet, I’m strangely addicted to these tasks, even though I have labeled them as not helpful.

Why? Because I’d rather be busy than disciplined.

Yet, in the end, it is discipline that matters more than being busy.

Here are some tasks that I find “I’m too busy to do,” but I need to discipline myself to do.

  • Reflect/think everyday on how to create a more effective and dynamic ministry. I‘m not talking about 1 to 2 hours. I’m talking about 15 to 30 minutes.
  • Coach and mentor my team.

  • Connect more regularly with key constituents, like priests and donors.
  • Develop and implement a better communication and marketing strategy.

These are just a few that I have not been disciplined enough to do more intentionally. These are the items that Stephen Covey would say are important, but not urgent.

It’s been said that good is the enemy of great. I’d like to add a related phrase:

Busy is the enemy of discipline.

Question: What tasks do you have to be more disciplined to do?

Filed Under: Attitude, Equipping, Leadership, Relationships Tagged With: ,

6 Things to Consider When Using Social Media in Your Ministry

April 18, 2013 Leave a Comment

Social media. It’s all the craze.

I was at a training the other day and the presenter was talking about how social media is such an important tool in ministry. He mentioned that social media was not only a place where people get a lot of information from (it’s the primary place I get my news), but it is also a source to connect and dialogue with people.

I agree.

One participant mentioned that he wasn’t on any of the social media platforms and he was not planning to enter them anytime soon. He was hesitant to use social media.

Even though I’m on many social media platforms, I know exactly where he is coming from.

MySpace was the first social media platform I joined (sorry, Friendster. I just wasn’t ready for you). I willingly jumped into it and I immediately begin to see some of the opportunities and some of the risks.

When Facebook came along, I quickly joined because all my friends were joining. It was a matter of weeks before I dumped MySpace completely.

Then Twitter came along. I heard about it from others, but wasn’t all that sure about it. I joined it in October 2008 and quickly loved it.

I was then encouraged by my Communications Director to start a separate Twitter account for my youth ministry. I fought it. I didn’t want to manage 2 Twitter accounts. However, her argument made sense, so I created an official ministry account (which quickly became 2, then 3, when I took on young adult ministry as well).

Then, I slowly delved into Facebook pages for youth ministry, young adult ministry, our sports program, and my REAL Ministry page.

More recently, I got a personal Instagram account and was encouraged to get a separate youth ministry Instagram account (we already had a young adult account). I really didn’t want to get into Instagram, but, again, I was convinced by some of my more media savvy team members

All in all, I currently manage and oversee (with a lot of help from others) 12 social media accounts. And trust me, there are times I wish I could get rid of them all!

However, I know that the social media tools I use are helpful in building my ministry and personal platforms. I connect with people. I share information with people. I dialogue with people. And, these accounts help keep my ministry in the minds of my “audience.” I can’t go back now.

When ministry leaders start thinking about social media, they immediately get overwhelmed. There are so many social media tools. The questions often comes, “where do I start???”

If you are new to using social media, or looking to expand your social media usage, there are some things you need to think through before you delve in.

1. Have a plan. Don’t get into social media just because it is what everyone is doing. Social media is ineffective if you don’t know how you are going to use it. There are all sorts of strategies that can be considered. Think it through.

2. Start slow. You don’t need to be on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all at the same time. Choose one and focus your energy on that tool.

3. Examine your audience. Which social media tool are they likely to be using? I’ve discovered that Facebook pages are good with many different audiences. However, Facebook is so noisy (because everyone is friends with everyone), it can be difficult to get your message across, which is why I personally prefer Twitter. Instagram is great with teenagers and young adults. Twitter seems to be more effective with an older audience, not so much with teens. I won’t even go into Google+ and Pinterest. Know where your audience is at and start there.

4. Be consistent with your posts. Social media works best when you post regularly. If you have a ministry Facebook page, once a day is probably enough. On Twitter and Instagram, it is more effective to post a few times a day.

5. Be interesting. What is your audience interested in? Post about that. Share links to articles or websites. Share photos and videos (photos always get the most comments).

6. Don’t do it alone. There is no reason you have to do it all yourself. Get a team together. They’ll probably help you use social media better than if you did it by yourself.

You may think because I oversee 12 social media accounts that I’ve got it all together. I don’t. I think I use Twitter effectively (my personal Twitter, not my ministry one). I have a long way to go with the others. I’m a rare user of Instagram and only post every once and awhile.

I’m still learning as I go. However, I do know that social media works in ministry. Think about these 6 things and get started. I know you can do it.

Question: What are you most hesitant about when it comes to social media usage in your ministry?

Filed Under: Leadership, Relationships

Volunteers and New-Born Babies: Similar or Different?

April 16, 2013 Leave a Comment

When my daughter was living through her first few months of life, I found myself reflecting on how caring for a newborn baby is very similar to being a leader and working with volunteers.

I used to watch parents and chuckle inside when I would see them praise their baby for everything little thing that they did. Now that I’ve been a parent, I can understand why. Everything my daughter did is the first time that she has done it. And it takes time to learn all those things. With each attempt, I found myself praising her efforts and affirming her. She smiles at me for the first time. “Good job!” She starts to control her head movement a little. “Yay!” She burps for the first time. “Way to go!” She grabs my finger with just a little more pressure and force. “Wow! You are awesome! You are so strong!”

These are mundane little things that I praised her for. But are they really mundane? For a newborn, they are a big deal.

When I work with adults in ministry and they start to learn new tasks, I sometimes don’t praise them. Why? That adult volunteer learning to lead a small group of teenagers for the first time is just as big of a deal as my daughter lifting her own head.

I find it so natural to affirm my child for all the new things that she is learning, even when she fails at it. But with adults, I sometimes can’t bring myself to do the same thing. Not that I need to treat the adults I work with in ministry like newborns, but I should be intentional about praising and affirming them when they are learning new skills and become better leaders.

If you have found yourself not being as affirming as you could with your team of volunteers, I recommend doing the following 3 steps:

  1. Make a list of the adults that you work with in ministry.
  2. Next to their name, write down three to five things that they should be praised for.
  3. Next time you work with them, affirm them for one of those things that you listed.

You will find that they will be more motivated next time to do a better job at their ministry role and work to become better leaders. Why? Because we all respond to positive praise and affirmation.

Just don’t talk to them like you would a newborn. That’s an easy way to lose a volunteer.

Question: What is the most powerful affirmation you have ever received?

Filed Under: Attitude, Equipping, Leadership, Relationships Tagged With:

The Ministry of Fundraising

April 4, 2013 Leave a Comment

I’d really like your feedback on this post. Please comment in the comment section. Thanks!

Anyone who works for a non-profit, like a church, has to consider the financial implications that they are under. I am only able to do the work I do because of the generous donations of people who care about our mission.

I take that very seriously.

I must be held accountable for the money I spend and how I spend it. I am careful to use dollars in the best way possible to serve our mission. I try not to waste any money and to make sure that the money is used in a beneficial way.

Because I am dependent on the generous financial gifts of others, part of my time needs to be spent trying to raise funds for my ministry.

There are about a million and half ways to raise money.

But what works best?

I feel like I have been part of every type of fundraising event possible, from annual appeals to bake sales, from car washes to fancy dinners with silent auctions. I’ve decided some work better than others.

Fundraising is not necessarily a natural strength in many ministry leaders, but it is one that needs to be fostered.

I’m really interested in your thoughts on fundraising.

I invite you to answer any or all of the questions below in the comments section. Not only will this help me, but I know it will help the many REAL Ministry readers.

  • What type of fundraising events have you had?
  • What worked well for you?
  • What didn’t work well for you?
  • What is the most amount of money you raised in a single fundraiser?
  • What is the least amount?

Question: Tell us about your experience around fundraisers.

Filed Under: Leadership, Relationships Tagged With: ,

At The Cross, I Am Changed

March 28, 2013 Leave a Comment

As Christians, today begins the most powerful and moving part of our faith, the Triduum, where we celebrate the Last Supper, the Crucifixion, and the Resurrection of Christ. In remembrance, I share this video with you.

As you view the video, pay close attention to the words of the song. The song is titled, “At the Cross,” by Matt Gowler and Scott Fairclof.

The first line of the refrain is powerful: “At the cross, I am changed.”

Question: How have you been changed because of what happened at the cross?

Filed Under: Attitude, Equipping, Leadership, Relationships Tagged With:

It’s Lonely At The Top

March 14, 2013 Leave a Comment

You may have heard this phrase uttered by leaders in the past:

“It’s lonely at the top.”

Not sure who came up with that, but if that person was lonely, then he or she was not a leader.

I sometimes fall into the trap of thinking that, “no one understands where I’m coming from. People don’t know how hard it is to be the leader.” I usually whine a little more and then I’m done.

Once I come to my senses, I realize that plenty of people do know where I’m coming from and people do know how difficult it can be to be a leader. I just have to find these people and intentionally make them part of my support network.

I figure, if I’m a leader and I’m at the top and I’m alone, then I’m not a leader. As the old saying goes:

“He who leads but has no followers is only taking a walk.”

Touché.

Every leader needs to gather others around them that can be a mentor, a friend, and an accountability partner. Every leader has to surround themselves with systems and structures that support them.

The tough part of being a ministry leader is that it can often feel like I’m alone, when, in reality, I’m not. I’m sure I could blame all sorts of people for this, but ultimately, if I’m alone, that’s my fault.

Create a support network that will allow you to thrive in your ministry. Here is who should be on that list:

  1. Spouse
  2. Other family members
  3. Pastor
  4. Co-workers that you collaborate with
  5. Volunteers
  6. Friends
  7. Counterparts in other local churches

In the Catholic Church structure, you also have an entire Diocesan support structure that can help, including:

  1. Diocesan director for your ministry
  2. Human Resources Office
  3. Safe Environment Office
  4. Office for Worship/Liturgy
  5. And a myriad of others depending on your Diocesan office

There is no excuse for you as a leader to say that it is lonely at the top. Reach out and find those support networks that will not only help you survive in your ministry, but will help you thrive!

Question: Who has been the best support to you in your ministry when you needed it most?

Filed Under: Leadership, Relationships