Rethinking Your Social Media Use

June 18, 2013 Leave a Comment

social mediaHow do you use social media in your ministry?

There’s no such thing as privacy. At least not online.

For all the energy that has been spent trying to protect our privacy, the reality is that everything that I do online is recorded somewhere somehow. If someone really wanted to get access to my Facebook photos or my internet browsing history, they can get it.

That begs the question how I might use online technology in my ministry if there is no guarantee of privacy.

It’s only partly about me. It’s also about those that I am ministering to using these online tools. I want to not only protect myself, but protect those I minister to.

Can I really trust using online technology in my ministry?

Yes!

Lately, I’ve been reading more and more about how social media can help with building your platform. This is true if you are trying to build a personal brand, a corporate brand, or even a church ministry.

I agree. Social media and technology can be really helpful. And there is a plethora to choose from. Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Google+, Pinterest, LinkedIn, MyFitnessPal, YouTube, Vimeo, online video games, websites, blogs, podcasts, etc… When used appropriately, they work well to reach out to the audience that you are trying to serve in ministry.

One of the challenges of social media is that it has come on so quickly, the policies change rapidly, and social media sites have come and gone in the blink of an eye (remember Friendster?).

The church has had a difficult time creating solid guidelines on how to use these tools. Whenever you create social media guidelines, there are 3 principles that should drive any policy:

  1. It should protect those you minister to, especially if they happen to be minors (under 18 years old).
  2. It should protect you as the minister.
  3. It should protect the church as an institution.

So what are some good guidelines to keep in mind when using social media in your ministry?

  • Create a Facebook Page that is separate from your personal profile.
  • Any social media sites used by a ministry (like a Facebook page or a Twitter handle) are the property of the church that is leading that ministry.
  • Always ask permission from your pastor/leader before setting up new social media tools for your ministry. Give your pastor/leader the password to all sites.
  • Be selective and control the administrators of any social media site you have for your ministry.
  • Post only group pictures, not photos of individuals.
  • Do not tag or label anyone in pictures that you post.
  • Create a photography/video consent form for members of your ministry to sign to give you permission to use their image.
  • While anyone you minister to might be on the phone or texting late into evening hours, set and communicate the time frame when it is acceptable to make or receive non-emergency professional calls.
  • Maintain a separate e-mail account for your professional communication and only use this account when communicating with members of your ministry.
  • Be cautious whom you give your personal cell phone number to.
  • Don’t friend everyone that wants to become your friend on Facebook (or other social media sites).

These are just a few guidelines that I have instituted in my own ministry or have seen instituted elsewhere.

Question: What other guidelines might you add to the list above?

Filed Under: Attitude, Relationships

Can You Really Trust Your Volunteers?

May 30, 2013 4 Comments

I had a meeting recently with one of my key volunteers who is helping lead a big ministry project. I was sharing my expectations of her within the context of her volunteer job description.

As I often do, I turned the conversation around. I asked her point blank: “What are your expectations of me?”

Since we have worked together for quite some time on different projects, she only mentioned one: “I expect you not to get that involved in the project.”

Wow. That’s a statement many ministry leaders would like to hear.

The reality is that I trust her completely to lead the ministry project I have entrusted to her. She knows that. Is she perfect at the role? No. Is she really good at the role? Yes.

I often fall prey to the idea that I can do ministry better than any of my volunteers. That may be true some of the time, but not always. However, it is that attitude that stops me from fully trusting and empowering my volunteers to do the job I have given them to do.

Can I really trust my volunteers? The answer is a resounding “Yes!”

However, trust is not something I just give away easily. It is something that is earned. A competent and trustworthy volunteer has done certain things that encourage me to trust them.

Here are 4 reasons that cause me to trust my volunteer:

  • They are 100% honest with me. The funny thing about ministry is that people feel like they have to sugarcoat the truth. This is motivated by the desire not to cause conflict. I understand that feeling, but I need volunteers who tell it like it is. I need them to tell me everything I need to know, good or bad. In turn, I know that I can be 100% honest with them. I really value this in my volunteers.
  • I have worked with them numerous times. Nothing beats experience, time, and a history of working with someone. Trustworthy relationships take time to develop. I sometimes wish it could happen overnight, but the reality is different. Once I have worked with someone, I have a much better sense of their style, their personality, and their gifts and strengths. This allows me to better position them for success. Plus, I usually have had the opportunity to train them as a volunteer minister.
  • They excel in their role. Basically, they do excellent work. This could mean all sorts of things. They are organized, they have made wise decisions, they work well with people, and they get the job done.  When one of your volunteers succeeds, it becomes easier to trust them. However, my role is to do everything in my power to make sure they succeed.
  • They haven’t given me a significant reason not to trust them. No volunteer is perfect. I expect them to mess up and fail from time to time. I’m okay with that. There are certain things that a volunteer can do to make me lose my trust in them. Aside from the biggies, there are some small things that make me lose confidence in my volunteer. Examples would be always being late, not showing up to meetings or events, or abusing social media. This list could go on and on. I imagine you have your list of things that causes you not to trust a volunteer.

In the end, my goal is to empower and equip my volunteers to succeed and grow the ministry beyond what I, myself, am capable of. I can only do that if I can trust my volunteers enough to hand them ministry projects and walk away to develop other areas of the ministry.

I still need to continue to support them. That support becomes a lot easier when I trust them.

Question: What does a volunteer do that causes you to trust them?

Filed Under: Attitude, Equipping, Leadership, Relationships Tagged With:

Warning: Burnout Ensuing

May 29, 2013 2 Comments

It happens to the best of us. At some point, you realize that you don’t like your ministry.

It’s not a long-term thought. It’s more of a fleeting and passing thought that this ministry you once loved is getting on your nerves. If nothing changes, as time progresses, you start to think about moving into another ministry or job and finding yourself really unhappy.

You are experiencing burn out.

Fortunately, there are many warning signs that burn out is ensuing. Here are 7 signs that you may be heading towards burn out. If you recognize these signs, it’s time to make a change to avoid the negative experience of burn out.

  • You worked 7 days in a row. I don’t care what anyone says, this is not healthy. Weekends are often a part of the job. Determine to have 2 days off each week. The day can vary, but try to pick the same day each week. When you are forced to work on your day off, pick another day in the week to take off. That means no meetings, no emails, no phone calls, and no prep work. A day off means doing nothing for your ministry.
  • You forget to eat meals. I really like food. I’m so shocked when I hear about people forgetting to eat. When you forget to eat, that means you are too busy. Sure, missing a meal here or there because you are enthralled in your work is one thing. Missing meals constantly is a bad sign.
  • You constantly work 12-hour days. I’ve been known to put in 12-hour days from time to time. Usually, it is before a big event or retreat. But this is a rare thing. If you find yourself putting in a 12-hour day more than once or twice a month, it is time to examine your workload or schedule.
  • You haven’t taken a real vacation in a year. I’ll be honest, I have a lot of vacation time stored up. This is not a good thing. That means I haven’t taken extensive time off in awhile. I need it not only to relax, but to stay connected with my family. You get vacation time for a reason. Use it.
  • You become impatient at even the smallest annoyances. I’m pretty patient, most of the time. Yet, there are times I find myself so annoyed by the little things that happen. All that means is that I need to take it easy. It’s time to use some of that vacation.
  • You begin to avoid people. Ministry is about people. There will always be people that I enjoy spending time with and those that I find I have to muster up the best attitude I have to be with them. When I am getting close to burn out, I find myself not wanting to spend time with people. I sometimes confine myself to my desk and hope no one comes and talks to me.
  • You keep getting sick. I’m not someone who gets sick very often. When I do get sick, it is usually during a busy time. If I have too many busy and stressful times in my ministry year, I tend to get sick more. My body is telling me to slow down and get some rest.

Burn out is obviously something that needs to be avoided. It is also something that can sneak up on me. I need to pay attention to these warning signs to avoid trouble.

Question: What are the other warning signs that burn out is ensuing?

Filed Under: Attitude, Leadership

Leaders Read and Readers Lead

May 24, 2013 6 Comments

I recently was listening to Michael Hyatt’s podcast, “How to Read a Non-Fiction Book.” I was really intrigued by the topic as I try to read daily a non-fiction book that will help me in my leadership.

He shared two tips that were really helpful to me.

The first was that he doesn’t feel the need to retain all the information he learned from reading a book. He said that the process of reading itself allows the mind to think and change in different ways. It’s good to retain the big nuggets that are helpful, but he freed me from the idea that I need to spit out verbatim the key points or messages in the book.

The second tip he shared that helped me was about how he selects books to read. The best way to find a good non-fiction book is to listen to the recommendations of his friends and family. The most quality books I’ve read have come in the form of recommendations.

With that said, I’d like to hear from you what books you are reading or have read that have transformed your leadership and ministry.

I recently did a whole blog series on the book, Forming Intentional Disciples, by Sherry Weddell. This was a ministry changing book for me!

The other books that I have read lately are these:

You’ll notice that not all of the books are necessarily ministry oriented, yet, they have all helped me in my ministry in some way, shape, or form. I recommend each of them as they have served interesting purposes in my life right now.

Question: What books have you read that have helped transform your leadership and ministry?

 

 

Filed Under: Attitude, Leadership

You’re Getting a New Pastor

May 22, 2013 2 Comments

Tis the season. For what, you ask?

Many churches begin to prepare for the transition of their pastor. July 1 is the typical day when a new pastor starts in a new church.

Many leaders in the church tend to get anxious during this time. Many questions run through their mind as they try to “guess” what the next pastor will be like.

  • Will he be supportive of my ministry?
  • Is he a micromanager?
  • What’s his vision for the church?
  • Is he going to fire us and bring in all new people?
  • Is he a good pastor?

It’s normal to ask those questions, and they are good questions to ask. I have colleagues on the Diocesan level that have the same apprehensions when they are expecting a new bishop. The challenge for them is that they are often told to not start anything new until the new bishop comes.

Basically, they are being asked to maintain the status quo until new leadership arrives.

Relax. There is no need to fear. Most pastors don’t come in assuming that your church is in need a major overhaul. Often times, they spend the first year just getting to know the new church community before instituting anything major.

If you are expecting a new pastor or bishop, I’d recommend doing these things while you wait.

  • Keep planning ahead for your ministry. Don’t wait for the new leader to come in and tell what to do. They often won’t tell you what to do. Plus, you are the keeper of the vision for your ministry. You are the expert. Keep moving forward.
  • Tie up all loose ends before the old pastor leaves. There is a sense of urgency during this time that you can take advantage of. The outgoing pastor wants to tie up loose ends too, and often decisions can be made much more quickly than before. This is a great time to make some significant changes that you’ve been wanting to make, but couldn’t until now.
  • Don’t assume a worst-case scenario about the new pastor. This doesn’t help your attitude or the people around you. Assume the best and have a good attitude.
  • Don’t talk badly about the outgoing or the incoming pastor. That’s just not cool and sets you up for disaster.
  • Prepare now for your first meeting with the new pastor. Set up an agenda outlining what you want to share with him about your ministry and how. This is your opportunity to set a good first impression about you as a ministry leader and your ministry.

Remember that pastors are human, too. They have apprehensions and fears about coming into a new church community and are probably asking some of the same questions that you are asking. Be prepared and have a good attitude about the transition in leadership.

Question: Are you expecting a new pastor? What are you doing in preparation?

Filed Under: Attitude, Leadership, Relationships

Finish Strong

May 20, 2013 Leave a Comment

I enjoy watching the Olympics. Two summer Olympic sports I love to watch are swimming and any sort of running race.

The best part of any race like this is watching the last lap. Immediately, the intensity of the athletes increase. You can see it both in their faces and in their strides. They know the finish line is near. It is in their sights. It’s now or never.

Each athlete begins to quicken their pace. They feel the thrill and adrenaline of the finish. It is time to finish strong.

And this is always where the race gets interesting, as each athlete pushes themselves seemingly beyond their athletic ability for the gold. The winner often wins by a margin of less than .1 seconds.

This is how I recently felt, as my 4-year term serving as a member on a board of directors came to an end. I knew I was close to the end. I also knew that there was still a lot to accomplish. I was anxious to finish the race. Yet, I still had a lap to go.

I always want to perform with excellence. I find it most difficult to perform with excellence at the end because of the anticipation of what it will be like after I finish. This was just as true as I completed my term on the board.

As I neared the finish line, I explored in myself 4 areas that I knew I needed to pay attention time if I desired to finish strong.

  • Stay focused on the present. It is so easy for me to get distracted by what it will be like after I cross the finish line. However, since the race is not finished, this type of thinking actually detracts me from finishing strong. To finish strong, I need to stay focused in the moment.
  • Lead with excellence. When I come to the end of something, I am so often in a hurry to finish that I begin to slack on my work. I begin to accomplish tasks with a “good enough” attitude, which does not meet my own high expectations. Finishing strong means to perform with the same intensity and excellence as I would when I am just beginning.
  • Be patient. As the end nears, I tend to want to move faster to the finish line. I begin to sprint. However, the other members of the team are not always in the same place as I am. Since ministry is about people, this requires me to slow down when necessary and be patient. I found myself at my last board meeting trying to rush agenda items, even though I knew the team needed more time to process.
  • Remain positive. I know people who, when they are finishing a project or leave a position, begin to rub it in the face of those that are sticking around. First of all, this makes you look like your bragging (and no one likes a bragger). Second of all, this doesn’t make the people who are staying feel good about what they are staying around for. If you care about the mission of the ministry or project you’ve been focused for some time, then you care for its success. If you care for its success, then you want to make sure that the people who are staying feel good about the mission as well.

As you begin to near the finish line, remember these 4 things: stay focused, lead with excellence, be patient, and remain positive.

Question: Share about an experience where you finished strong.

Filed Under: Attitude

5 Things That A Good Attitude Cannot Do For You

May 15, 2013 Leave a Comment

Attitude makes a difference.

Yeah, yeah, you know that. You’ve heard it for years. It’s so cliché.

And yet, you know it’s true.

For years, I’ve heard about all the things that attitude can do for you. In fact, I think the topic is so important that I dedicated a whole letter of REAL Ministry to it.

A = Attitude.

But, there are things that attitude can’t do for you. In fact, there are 5 things that attitude can’t do for you. Before I take the credit for any of these great ideas, you must know that John C. Maxwell first suggested this list in his book, The Difference Maker, which, by the way, is a great book to read.

Here are the 5 things that attitude can’t do for you, with some of my thoughts and comments.

  1. Your attitude cannot substitute for competence.

It’s true. You can think you are good at something, but, if you are not good at it, no amount of positive thinking will help you be good at it. Some people seem to confuse confidence, which is a function of attitude, with competence, which is a function of ability.

  1. Your attitude cannot substitute for experience.

There are just some things that you only learn from experience. The problem with experience is that you rarely have it until you need it. This is a great story that depicts what experience can do for you.

A fox, a wolf, and a bear went hunting, and each got a deer. A discussion followed about how they should divide the spoils. The bear asked the wolf how he thought it should be done. The wolf answered, “That’s simple. Each of us should get one deer.” As soon as the wolf was done speaking, the bear ate him. Then the bear asked how the fox proposed to divvy up the spoils. The fox offered his deer to the bear and suggested that the bear take the wolf’s as well. “Where did you get such wisdom?” asked the bear. “From the wolf,” replied the fox.

  1. Your attitude cannot change the facts.

Facts are facts. Sometimes, I try to deny the facts. However, it is very difficult to deny data. If it is a fact, accept it. Your good attitude cannot convince your pastor that your ministry is going well when, in actuality, the numbers show that you are not reaching your intended audience.

  1. Your attitude cannot substitute for personal growth.

A good attitude does not mean you are growing. Just like attitude not being a good substitute for experience, nothing substitutes for personal growth. If you are to continue to succeed in ministry, taking your personal growth is essential.

  1. You attitude will not stay good automatically

I have a natural disposition towards a good attitude, but I still need to work on it. Just like anyone, I can get caught in the negativity of the world. It takes work to have a good attitude. Everyone is attracted to a good attitude. If you purposely work towards having a good attitude, then I guarantee that you will attract more volunteers, more families, and more resources to your ministry.

Question: Which attitude misconception do you fall for?

Filed Under: Attitude Tagged With:

The Secret to Success

May 10, 2013 2 Comments

How would you define success?

I have heard many definitions over the years. Some I agree with. Some, I don’t.

In the world today, success is often defined as fame, wealth, and power. Let’s be honest. Who hasn’t had dreams of these things? When I was a kid, I either wanted to be an actor or an athlete. If I was successful at either, I just knew it would bring my fame and wealth.

In our video today, John C. Maxwell defines success a little differently.

Question: How do you define success?

Filed Under: Attitude, Leadership Tagged With: ,

The Biggest Mistake a Leader Can Make

May 2, 2013 Leave a Comment

Have you made a mistake lately?

If your answer to this question is anything but “yes,” then you’re either lying or not leading.

Part of being a leader means dealing with your own mistakes and failures. It happens. There are some mistakes that are bigger than others.

In this video, different leaders share what they think some of the biggest mistakes are that a leader can make. As I watched, I found myself nodding my head often, as I reminisced about the times I have made those very mistakes.

Question: Which mistake shared in the video do you agree with the most? What mistake would you add?

Filed Under: Attitude, Equipping, Leadership, Relationships Tagged With:

Are You Busy or Disciplined?

April 30, 2013 Leave a Comment

“Most of us lead busy but undisciplined lives. We have ever-expanding ‘to do’ lists, trying to build momentum by doing, doing, doing – and doing more. And it rarely works. Those who build the good-to-great companies, however, made as much use of ‘stop doing’ lists as ‘to do’ lists. They displayed a remarkable discipline to unplug all sorts of extraneous junk.” –Jim Collins

I take personal offense to this quote. Why? Because it describes me perfectly!

I like to be on the move. I’m a doer. I take action. In fact, my wife accused me of stressing her out when at home one weekend. While we should have been relaxing and enjoying our time together, I wanted to try and take care of this, that and, oh yeah, that too!

She busted me in only a way a spouse could. And she was right.

I bring that same attitude to my ministry. I sometimes think to myself, “As long as I’m doing something, anything, then my ministry will be a success.”

Well, after years of being busy, do I have the success I was looking for?

Yes and no.

Yes in the sense that I have moved the ministry forward in innovative and exciting ways. No in the sense that I know I could have been much further along if I was more disciplined.

Daily, I keep doing things that aren’t helpful in moving my ministry forward. Yet, I’m strangely addicted to these tasks, even though I have labeled them as not helpful.

Why? Because I’d rather be busy than disciplined.

Yet, in the end, it is discipline that matters more than being busy.

Here are some tasks that I find “I’m too busy to do,” but I need to discipline myself to do.

  • Reflect/think everyday on how to create a more effective and dynamic ministry. I‘m not talking about 1 to 2 hours. I’m talking about 15 to 30 minutes.
  • Coach and mentor my team.

  • Connect more regularly with key constituents, like priests and donors.
  • Develop and implement a better communication and marketing strategy.

These are just a few that I have not been disciplined enough to do more intentionally. These are the items that Stephen Covey would say are important, but not urgent.

It’s been said that good is the enemy of great. I’d like to add a related phrase:

Busy is the enemy of discipline.

Question: What tasks do you have to be more disciplined to do?

Filed Under: Attitude, Equipping, Leadership, Relationships Tagged With: ,

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    • Husband and father of 1 daughter. Director of Youth and Young Adult Ministry, Diocese of San Jose. Chairperson, National Federation for Catholic Youth Ministry. Been in full time ministry for over 11 years.