Lesson Learned: Situational Leadership

October 19, 2011 3 Comments

One of the biggest leadership lessons I’ve learned (so far) came in 2001. I was volunteering as a small group leader for the Archdiocese of Los Angeles’ Christian Leadership Institute (CLI). CLI is a week-long leadership institute for high school leaders. The entire week is devoted to teaching and practicing leadership skills in a Christian context.

As a small group leader, they required us to take a leadership behavior questionnaire that informed us of our default style of leadership. The lesson began here. I learned that I defaulted to an S3 style of leadership. What does that mean? Well, let’s start at the beginning.

There are two basic behaviors in leadership: directive and supportive.

  • Directive behavior: defined as one-way communication from the leader to the team that spells out what, where, when, and how to do something.
  • Supportive behavior: defined as two-way communication, in which the leader listens, provides encouragement, facilitates interaction, and involves the team in decision-making.

Neither is better than the other. As leaders, we must decide what type of leadership our team needs in certain situations, hence, situational leadership. There are four types of leadership style:

  • S1: Directing Behavior; high directive, low supportive. perfect for new teams that are excited and motivated, yet have no clue what to do. My job as a leader is to provide clear directions.
  • S2: Coaching Behavior; high directive, high supportive. At this stage, the team still needs a lot of direction because they are still fairly new, but the novelty of a new experience has waned. The team is less excited about the work they are doing. My job as a leader is to still provide lots of direction, but also provide more support and encouragement.
  • S3: Supporting Behavior; low directive, high supportive. At this stage, the team is getting the hang of the work that needs to be done, but is still not totally confident. My job as a leader is to provide lots of support, but the team needs less directive behavior from me.
  • S4: Delegating Behavior; low directive, low supporting. At this stage, you are working with a highly functioning team that knows what they are doing and is providing supportive behavior from within the team. My job as a leader is to back off and provide less direction and support.

Teams can easily move back and forth from stage to stage. As a ministry leader, when I am working with a team, even though I tend to default to an S3 style of leadership (which is very common among ministry leaders), I must analyze which style of leadership I need to be practicing. I cannot practice one style on all team and expect it to work every time. When I do analyze where the team is at, it allows me and the team to be more effective, which in turn helps grow the ministry and raise up more leaders from the group.

*Situational Leadership was developed by the Ken Blanchard Company. All descriptions and images used on this blog post can be attributed to Ken Blanchard.

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Celebrate Together!

October 18, 2011 Leave a Comment

One of our co-workers in our ministry is getting married this weekend! Totally exciting in our world. These two individuals are awesome Catholics and awesome ministers. This is an exciting moment in their Christian journey.

Today, we threw what we called a “groom shower” for the groom and invited his fiancee to join us. We had more food than we needed, balloon animals created by one of our team members, a gift, cake, a blessing for the couple, and an apple cider toast. It was a great lunch. The funnest part was watching the bride and groom revel in the celebration. It was fun and the bride and groom were very grateful. What a nice send off for their wedding.

I didn’t plan the event, but I’m glad someone did. As I participated in the celebration, I thought about how important moments like these are. We celebrated as a ministry community a huge event in the life of someone we minister with and care for. The celebration communicated a few things today:

  1. It brought us closer together as a community.With events like this, we can’t help but smile and enjoy each others company.
  2. The groom felt supported and loved by his ministry team.He walked away from the celebration knowing that we truly do care for him and his life outside of the office. That leads us to number three:
  3. Our lives outside of the ministry are just as important as what we do in the ministry.We value each other as ministers and as people who have lives outside of ministry.
  4. The community that eats together, stays together…and also gains weight together. Okay, hopefully not the weight thing, but sharing meals, breaking bread together is exactly what Jesus did!

The groom is going to walk away knowing that the ministry that he is involved in is awesome because of the people he gets a chance to work with. He knows we care for him.

The learning for me is that I need to be intentional about celebrating with those I minister with. Whether that is volunteers, fellow staff members, or the people I minister to, these celebrations go a long way to making people feel cared for and building community and momentum. From now on, I’m going to pay attention to opportunities that are worth celebrating. It will make a difference.

In what ways do you celebrate with your ministry team? Let me know and post in the comment section below.

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Just Say No!

October 12, 2011 Leave a Comment

I’m reminded of my elementary school days when I was going through D.A.R.E., Drug Abuse Resistance Education. The big learning of that program was to just say no! I’d like to start a new program: Y.A.R.E., Yes Abuse Resistance Education.

See if this doesn’t ring a bell: You’re sitting in your ministry office trying to catch up on emails. You’re trying to catch up because you have too many things on your plate. In walks __________ (fill in the blank of a person likely to walk in your office). This person asks you for a favor. “Would you mind doing ____________ (fill in the blank with a ministry project)?” Now, what is your typical response?

If you are like me, your typical response would be yes. (It could be “sure” or “okay,” but then the acrostic would be S.A.R.E. or O.A.R.E. We know Y.A.R.E. makes more sense : ). Why do we say yes in ministry? Here are a few reasons:

  • Guilt: “How do I say no to a good thing? It’s ministry. It’s for God. I should always say yes.”
  • Unrealistic sense of time: “Sure! I have plenty of time to do that. I’ll just work 14 hour days. I don’t have to go home and spend time with my wife and kids. It’ll be fine!”
  • Lack of specifics: “I have no idea what you really want me to do, but sounds easy enough. Sure.”
  • Lack of priorities: “My main ministry is not as important as this new project. I’ll do it!”

I joke… a little. If I am to be a good leader in ministry, I have to recognize the need to say no. There are an infinite amount of projects I could do. All good things. But I cannot do them all. Here’s what I have done that help me determine whether I should just say no!

  1. Listen to God’s voice, not guilt. I believe guilt is not a function of God. However, when an opportunity does come up, take time to listen to the voice of God. What is God saying about this new project? This allows me to have God’s interests in mind as I say yes or no.
  2. Manage the calendar well. The better I manage it, the better sense I have of the time required to get the project done. If I don’t really have the time, then I need to be honest and say no. (Read here for more on this topic.)
  3. Ask for clarity. I say yes too easily before I know all the details that are involved. I soon realize what I thought would be an easy project has turned into something difficult.
  4. Make sure I know my priorities in rank order. For me, they are family, my main ministry in youth and young adult ministry, and my doctorate work. Everything else falls underneath these items. These can change from time to time, but my family will always be number one.

This is important to me. I have to say no from time to time.

Filed Under: Attitude, Leadership Tagged With: ,

Lessons from Netflix?

October 11, 2011 1 Comment

As I was listening to radio news today, I heard a report that Netflix is going back on a decision they made months ago, mainly, to not separate the DVD and streaming options from subscriber plans. Now, I’m not a Netflix user. I don’t know all the details of how this came about. But I do know that Netflix’s stock prices has tumbled 50% since the announcement that happened months ago and that is because Netflix has lost about one million subscribers. It was those two facts that caused Netflix to realize its mistake and make a change.

This is not a business blog, but I think Netflix has something to teach us who are involved in leadership and ministry. Netflix started to realize that things were changing for them. They chose to respond with a certain strategy. That strategy caused enough “pain” for Netflix to reverse their decision. Netflix taught me a few things:

  1. Sometimes we have to be bold and make a decision to move forward, even if we don’t know what the results will be. For Netflix, that means changing how its subscriptions work. For us in ministry, it means changing the way we minister so that it truly engages people to follow Christ and be transformed.
  2. When something does not work, change it. Netflix did. So can we. Not everything we do in ministry is going to work. We have to try new things. However, if it doesn’t work, we can always make another change. The trap that we often fall into in ministry is the following statement: “We’ve always done it that way.” Actually, no we haven’t always done it that way. The other trap is this: “We just made the change. We can’t change it back.” Actually, you can. If it doesn’t work, change again!
  3. Listen to our members. Netflix heard loud and clear from stockholders and its subscribers. So they reversed their decision. We must take the time to listen to our members and those we serve. They will help us refine and reshape our decisions and help us make changes that are best for the needs of those we serve.
  4. Don’t wait until the pain is too great! Netflix has caused a lot of damage to its brand. The lesson for us in ministry is that we need to change as soon as we see signs that the ministry strategy we employed is not working. We cannot afford to damage our relationships with the faithful that come to our ministry and church each week.

Who knew Netflix could teach me so much about ministry? Thanks for the lesson!

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Moving Forward, Building Momentum

September 30, 2011 1 Comment

During lunchtime today, my colleague and friend, Steve, were discussing where we were in ministry a year ago and where we are now. We were both struck by how people and resources have come out of the woodwork over the past year to help us succeed in our ministry to youth and young adults. In the past year and a half, we were able to launch six new ministry initiatives. We were surprised at how people have so willingly and graciously offered their time, talent, and treasure to make these initiatives happen. For that, we are grateful.

What shocked us the most was when Steve and I started these projects, we had nothing. No volunteers, no money, no equipment. We created a plan and set the vision in motion. As the vision caught on, it was amazing to both of us how things came together. We didn’t know how it would come together. It just did. We only have the Holy Spirit and those people to thank for what has happened.

I couldn’t help reflect on the leadership principles I learned in this short lunchtime discussion.

  1. If we wait to act, we will never act. I thought about an analogy I heard before. “If you wait for all the lights in town to turn green before your start driving, you will never start driving.” How true that is. We didn’t know which lights were green or red. We just started driving.
  2. As we start to act, the resources will make themselves apparent. In other words, “If you build it, they will come.” There were so many missing pieces as we began this vision for our ministry. We knew that. But we figured that we would find a way. And we did. People volunteered. People provided equipment. People donated money. People stood up to take a lead. We couldn’t even imagine this when we started. But it happened.
  3. As we keep acting on the vision and moving forward, excitement, energy, and momentum start to build. What’s so much fun about this time in our ministry is not the actual projects themselves (although that’s cool), it’s how excited the people are about the projects and how much they enjoying being a part of the team. Now we are building off of that energy. Now is not the time to stop or slow down. Now is the time to keep ramping it up because we do have the momentum in our favor. If we do slow down, that excitement, energy, and momentum will start to wane.

Do you have an exciting vision? Just start moving forward. Come up with and execute the plan. If it’s a vision worth pursuing, the Holy Spirit will provide.

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Confrontation in Leadership

September 28, 2011 Leave a Comment

I’m working on a new long-term project with a ministry friend of mine. For all intents and purposes, we are equals in this project. We have different gifts and strengths that make us a good team. However, those differing traits mean that we work very differently at times.

We met today to discuss the project and I had to share my honest thoughts with this person…about myself. I let her know that, as we work on this project, we will get to know each others style of leadership very well. I shared with her a couple reflections about myself:

  • I am action oriented (i.e. impatient). That means, at times, I forgo the collaborative process and move forward without talking through the decision first, especially under time constraints.
  • I have a strong personality at times in my ministry. That means, I can influence others to see something my way (for better or worse).

So I was totally honest with her. In the last two days, I failed to consult her on two items about this project that were important. I apologized (and, unfortunately, it won’t be the last time that I apologize, but I’m a work in progress). Then I asked her for a favor: “I need you to call me out when I forgo the collaborative process. I need you to confront me when I do something wrong.”

Here’s what I learned about leadership in this situation:

  1. I need people in my life who will tell me the truth, even if I don’t like to hear it. I need people who feel comfortable to confront me in a loving and pastoral way. I don’t need people who will do absolutely everything I tell them to do without question. Sometimes, questioning the process is the best way to make the process better.
  2. I need to tell people that I am open to that feedback and confrontation. I did that today. I know I won’t always like what they have to say, but I need to be open to it. And those I work with need to be comfortable doing sharing those thoughts we me.
  3. I need to react in a positive way when I am confronted the first time (and the second time and third and fourth and…). My reaction sets the tone for how people will respond and work with me in the future. If I respond negatively, then that person is not likely to confront or challenge me again. If I act positively, then the chances are that our working relationship will grow stronger and we will be a great team. This is not about putting on a show or a face. It’s about my attitude towards the confrontation.

It takes a secure and humble leader to be open to criticism. As ministry leaders, we all should strive for this. It won’t be easy, however, to be a successful leader, we must embrace it.

Filed Under: Attitude, Relationships Tagged With: ,

Wisdom on Church and Ministry

September 26, 2011 Leave a Comment

I ran into this fascinating piece on church, and every time I read it, it makes me think. Enjoy!

“Concerning the why and how and what and who of ministry, one image keeps surfacing: a table that is round.

It will take some sawing to be roundtabled, some redefining and redesigning.

Such redoing and rebirthing of narrowlong churching can be painful for people and tables.

But so was the cross, a painful too table of giving and yes.

And from such death comes life, from such dying comes rising, in search of roundtabling.

And what would roundtable churching mean? It would mean no separating and throning, but for one king is there, and he was a footwasher, at table no less.

A healer of hearts, he, and bestower of disturbing peace, whose footsteps we lost track of.

We looked for signs, but with uncircumcised hearts, trying to discern a message indiscernible to pomped and circumstanced, yet well-intentioned ones, who while proclaiming the finding, were all the time losing.

For at the narrowlong tables, servant and mirror became picture framed and centers of attention.

And crosses became but gilded ornaments on bare stone walls in buildings used but once a week only.

But the times and the tables are changing and rearranging.

And what of narrowlong table ministers, when they confront a round table people, after years of working up the table (as in ‘up the ladder’) to finally sit at its head, only to discover that the table has turned round?

Continued rarefied air will only isolate for there are not people there, only roles.

They must be loved into roundness, where apart is spelled a part and the call is to gathering.

For God has called a People, not ‘them and us.’ ‘Them and us’ are unable to gather round, for at a roundtable, there are no sides.

And all are invited to wholeness and to food.

‘When more than was last has been found has been found’ (e.e. cummings).

But wishing and hoping will not get us there – daily dying and rising will (and some sawing).

At one tine our narrowlong churches were built so to resemble the cross, but it does no good for buildings to do so, if lives do not.

Roundtabling means no preferred seating, no first and last, no better, and no corners for the ‘least of these.’

Roundtabling means being with, a part of, together, and one.

It means room for the Spirit and gifts and disturbing profound peace for all.

It is no magic bread that we are baking, for the dough we are dealing with must and will take its dying-in-order-to-rise-again-time.

And it is we in the present who are mixing and kneading the dough for the future. We can no longer prepare for the past.

We will and must and are called to be Church, and if He calls for other than roundtables, we are bound to follow.

Leaving behind the sawdust and chips, designs and redesigns behind.

All the while being harmless as doves and wily as serpents in search of and in the presence of the Kingdom that is God’s and not ours.”

–A Gentle Presence by Chuck Lathrop

Filed Under: Attitude, Equipping, Leadership, Relationships Tagged With: ,

Leading into the Unknown…Together

September 22, 2011 Leave a Comment

Today, I had the opportunity to hike with five other people to the Garden of the Gods in Colorado Springs. The map took us to an overlook with a beautiful elevated view of the Garden of the Gods. The picture to the right is the view we had from that beautiful spot. After we made it to the overlook, we looked down and asked each other, “Should we find our way down there?” The map showed no trails that would get us to the Garden of the Gods. But all six of us agreed. We were going to try. We began to journey down unmarked trails or paths that looked like trails. We had no idea how we would get to the Gardens, but we had it in our sights and we just kept on making decisions to go right or left or straight to get us closer and closer. It was the unknown journey. We finally did make it down to the Garden of the Gods after some work and trailblazing. It was totally worth it.

As I reflected on the experience, I immediately saw a practical leadership lesson in this journey. If I was on this hike alone, I would have been less confident about my decisions to find the path down to the Gardens. In fact, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have even tried and I would have gone back the way I came, the sure route home. But with six of us there, the adventure seemed possible and doable. We didn’t stop to question whether this was the right way. We just decided to go. It was much easier to do in a team. And our journey was a success.

The principle I learned was that:

  • It is easier to lead into the unknown together then it is to journey their by ourselves.

This is true for a few reasons:

  1. Together, there is more feedback and input to help make the right decision.
  2. Together, the decision was a group effort. We were able to lead with greater confidence knowing that we made the decision together.
  3. Together, when we doubt, we quickly work to turn that doubt into the next action step.
  4. Together, when one falls down, the others are there to help lift them back up.

A wise leader brings others around them that will help move the ministry or organization forward with greater confidence. The input from others is key, not only to make the right decision, but also to keep the team motivated to continue on the unknown journey. A leader does not lead by themselves. A leader leads with others. And that’s the power of teamwork.

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Got a Problem? Give Me a Solution!

September 21, 2011 1 Comment

I had an interesting conversation today about the challenges and blessings that the Church is facing today in the 21st century. We had an opportunity to reflect by ourselves, followed by a small group conversation. After the small group conversation, each group was asked to report back to the large group their observations and ideas. All four groups had an opportunity to share their list of blessings and their list of challenges.

After the first two groups reported, I was feeling kind of depressed. The list of challenges was much longer then the list of blessings. To be honest, I was kind of annoyed as well. We spent all this time coming up with challenges (or problems), and not one solution was brought forth. This was true for my small group as well. At one point during the discussion, I shared my depression and then shared an observation and question. “Some problems we don’t have any influence over. Some we do. So my question is this: what are three things we can do that will have an impact over the 80% of challenges we have influence over?” I was trying to problem solve.

I discovered something really simple: Anybody can come up with a problem. It takes a leader to come up with solutions. I asked the question I did because I didn’t just want to focus on problems. I wanted to come up with solutions!

One of the rules of thumb I’ve heard before is the following:

  • If you bring me a problem, you need to bring me three solutions as well.

I really like this concept. I don’t want people in ministry that just come up with problems all day long. I want leaders. Bring me solutions. It is a true test of a leader if s/he can bring solutions to the table.

New rule for my ministry: If you bring me a problem, bring me three solutions. I’m sure my team will be thrilled. However, there are benefits to this way of thinking.

  1. People will bring me less problems. Why? Because they know they have to get creative a bring some solutions.
  2. We will solve the problems faster. Immediately after the problem is named, we will have three choices to pursue that will help bring closure to the problem. We’ll be able to decide and move forward.
  3. The teams attitude will change. We will be less problem-oriented to more solution-oriented. We will move from looking for problems to looking for solutions. That will cause us to look at any challenges that come our way with hope, knowing that we will have a plan of action to solve.

Alfred A. Montapert wisely stated, “The majority see obstacles; the few see the objectives; history records the successes of the latter, while oblivion is the reward of the former.”

Let us all be leaders who look for solutions, not just problems.

Filed Under: Equipping, Leadership Tagged With: ,

Responsivness: Required for Leadership

September 16, 2011 Leave a Comment

Has this ever happened to you…

I send an email on Monday about something that needs to be resolved quickly. No response. I think to myself, “Ok, they’re busy, I’ll give them 48 hours.” Still, no response by Wednesday. It’s still urgent and needs to be resolved. So I send another email with more urgent language. No response after another 48 hours. I try again the following Monday. This time, my email is quick and snappy. I don’t even sign my name. It’s urgent. I need a response. Nothing…for over 2 weeks. I call on the phone. No answer. I visit their office. Not there. They are off-site. Now my urgent concern has become a huge problem and I can’t adequately do my job without fixing it. What do I do now?

Fortunately, this does not happen to me too often, but when it does, I get a little frustrated. It would be one thing if they set an away message and they were gone for a month on vacation. But no away message was left. They’re around. Just too busy. At least too busy for me.

One of my previous supervisors in ministry instilled in me the importance of being responsive. He always told us to respond to every email or call within 24 hours, unless it is the weekend or we’re on vacation. My job is to serve, and if someone calls or emails me, I respond. It’s important.

Since I have decided to work in a field that is about servant leadership, it is my responsibility to be responsive to those I serve. When I respond to someone quickly, it communicates a few things to them:

  1. That I value them as a person.
  2. That I value their ministry.
  3. That I really want to help.
  4. That I’m here for them.

Being responsive is affirming to those we work with. And sometimes that response is that I need more time to work on it or do some more research, but I’ll get back you soon. This way, they still feel the list above and they know that I’m working on it.

And when we’re not responsive, it communicates the opposite:

  1. That I don’t value them.
  2. That I don’t value their ministry.
  3. That I don’t want to help.
  4. That I’m not there for them.

If you were on the receiving end of your leadership, which list would you rather feel about your leader? Yes, the first list. Of course. And when a leader is not responsive, that leader loses two important things: respect and trust.

So practice responsiveness. It makes a difference.

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